We are used to the fact that children are open to the world around them and meet new people with enthusiasm. However, some children prefer to watch cartoons and play video games instead of interacting with their peers.
In kindergarten and on playgrounds, these preschool children are distinguished from other children and do not intend to play an active role. Today we will tell you why the crumb is not friendly with anyone and how mom and dad can help you.
Children’s unwillingness to communicate with their peers should be a wake-up call for parents, since the success of their entire lives depends on their social skills. This school of skills and career heights, and success in your personal life.
The first friends in the life of a child.
Regular contact with peers is usually related to the baby at the time of admission to daycare, kindergarten or short stay group. How does childhood friendship begin?
- Two-year-olds relate relationships with other children playing games together. Children learn the game and, at the same time, they learn to make friends, observing and imitating each other. There is no clear leader in this interaction, this role moves smoothly from one baby to another.
- The high capacity for friendship is manifested in those young children who can communicate freely with their parents and other important adults.
- Three and four year old preschoolers can now put themselves in the place of a friend. When another child cries or is offended, a crumb can show sympathy, repent, defend his defense.
- And in four or five years we can talk about constant friendly relations, when a child, according to his own criteria, meets one or two close friends with whom he wants to maintain good relations not only in kindergarten, but also beyond .
Signs of child loneliness
Not always a little man can approach his parents and complain that nobody is friends with him in the group and in the playground. This is especially true for closed and timid children.
How can adults guess that their child suffers from loneliness?
- Get used to the behavior of children in the sandbox, in the playground. A crumb can show more activity, run, swing on a swing, build kulichiki, but not interact with their peers or, on the contrary, fight and conflict with them.
- Alienation is easier to discern in a preschool group, where preschoolers spend more free time than at home. Try to pay attention to whether the baby is playing with someone or just sitting alone. In holiday marriages, see if he is active, if he enjoys success among classmates.
- A small loner with great reluctance attends kindergarten, trying to find any escape so as not to go there. He does not want to talk about kindergarten children, adults need to get that information out of him almost with ticks.
- The days of birthdays and names are carried out without partners (with the exception of brothers and cousins), who also do not call the child to their own celebrations.
Of course, this is not all the symptoms of childhood loneliness, but the most obvious. You may have noticed other signs of loneliness and an unwillingness to communicate with your baby.
Why is the child not friendly to anyone?
The loneliness of a preschooler should alert parents, because it is natural to look for companions in games. What are the reasons why a child avoids communication?
Or maybe it’s with him that he does not want to play with his teammates?
- Of course, when evaluating the behavior of children, you must take into account the personal characteristics of the baby. Introverted children and phlegmatic children themselves are not willing to initiate multiple relationships. And a child who is ahead of his peers in terms of development is usually more towards adults and not preschool children.
- Unfortunately, children are often quite cruel and annoy those who have obvious differences regarding them. Wearing glasses, stuttering, red hair or being overweight can be the favorite cause of ridicule and ridicule. Hence the resentment of colleagues and lack of willingness to contact them.
- Sometimes parents themselves are guilty of being alone, who for various reasons try to protect a child from other children. This can be a serious illness in a baby, the desire to find more advantages in a friends position.
- Characteristic characteristics that interfere with communication, such as aggression, shyness, isolation, often lead to the fact that children become true outcasts who can not offer an interesting idea for entertainment and are afraid to join the game.
- Raising a child as a “family idol”, instilling the idea that he must always be the first, striving for leadership, adults can harm the child. There is a possibility that such a pet refuses to communicate with children who do not accept the chosen position.
- Another risk group consists of “home” children who spend most of their time with their mother and grandmother. When they enter a kindergarten, they have obvious difficulties when communicating with their peers and, often, they can not find friends on their own.
However, if the child refuses contact, it is time to take effective measures to improve their socialization.
What should an adult do if the child is not anyone’s friend?
In fact, parents can do many useful things to help the baby make friends with other children. For example, to present a partner who has similar interests.
We offer some more tips from experienced psychologists.
- The lonely child needs to feel the support of his parents. If you had an unpleasant personal experience in childhood (without friends), be sure to share it. The main point of this conversation is to tell you how you faced this situation.
- Try to organize at home a variety of holidays and entertainment, to which you can invite classmates. It is likely that outside the walls of a preschool, children make friends much faster. Another idea is to meet the mothers of other children and go out to joint family gatherings: in the park and in the cafeteria.
- If isolation and alienation are associated with the characteristics of the child’s own psychological behavior (sensitivity, aggression, deterioration, isolation), do not be afraid to seek the support of an experienced specialist.
- Write to your offspring in a dance school or sports section if your child is not overweight. With this, you will help your child get rid of psychological complexes that interfere with the friendship and knowledge of their peers.
- Bring a ball and multi-colored crayons to the playground or kindergarten, then you can arrange a joint game in the center of which your child will be. Offer children to play with mobile entertainment: salki, hide and seek, hide, steal Cossacks and.
- Ask for the help of an educator who can include the child in a theatrical activity. These classes have a wonderful effect on shy children, who in a relaxed environment can establish good relationships with their peers.
- Experienced teachers can also tell moms and dads with whom of the children their little loner interacts best. Ask your doctor to plant them at the same table during breakfast and training activities.
You can not force a child to be a friend of a specific partner, to impose communication with friends on the playground and classmates. Do not forget that careless words and deeds can cause negative consequences in future school life.